Mila Kunis Sued for Stealing a Chicken

Mila Kunis Sued for Stealing a Chicken

MILA Kunis IS BEING Sued OVER A STOLEN Chicken NAMED "DOGGIE"

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In totally normal news concerning normal people and their regular, everyday movements, a completely normal person has filed a lawsuit against Mila Kunis, alleging that Kunis stole a Chicken named "Doggie" some 25 years ago – which, again, is absolutely a thing a totally normal person would do.

The story goes that 25-odd years ago, when Kunis was still living in the Ukraine and in the first grade, her pal Kristina Karo had a pet Chicken that answered to "Doggie" whom she loved like a dog and was quite fond of. Kunis, they say, was also quite taken with Doggie, and would often visit after school to play with the pet.

But then one day something went terribly wrong.

Doggie went missing. And Kristina says that, back in the day, Mila confessed to Stealing the bird."Kristina, you can have any other Chicken as a pet, you have a whole Chicken farm."
Needless to say, this sent Karo spiralling down into a mental wreck, eventually requiring extensive therapy.

The years passed. Mila and her family moved to Los Angeles where she became the bright, shining star that she is today. Kristina herself made the jump across to America to try and start a new life and pursue her dreams. But the scars of that awful day, that terrible theft, still ran deep. Try as she could, she simply could not get away from that awful day. The day her beloved Doggie was stolen from her. Swiped away by a menacing, calculating, back-stabbing former friend.

Kristina has never been able to full recover. In fact, you could say she’s been sent clucking mad.

The proximity of living in the same city as Kunis has proven too great a mental hurdle to overcome, with the vision of Doggie dancing in her head returning anew. So Kristina has been forced back into therapy over the incident, leading her to file the lawsuit against Mila in order to recoup the money spent on treatment, as well for the lifetime of mental duress the childhood theft has caused.

And that is why Kristina Karo is suing Mila Kunis for the preposterous sum of…

$5,000.

Karo, realistically, just wants to finally put the whole incident behind her so she can focus on furthering her career.

Which is, um… this.

https://youtu.be/_663i6ffpzk (again, I can’t get video to post)

Mila Kunis Is Being Sued Over A Stolen Chicken Named "Doggie" – Pedestrian TV



Justin Theroux Keeps Stealing Jennifer Aniston’s Moisturizer

Justin Theroux Keeps Stealing Jennifer Aniston’s Moisturizer

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And not for the reason you’re thinking. Justin Theroux isn’t a normal boyfriend, he’s a cool boyfriend. When Justin Theroux jacks off, he Keeps it real by using motorcycle grease, the shoe polish from his hair, and the torn-off scraps from hishomemade jorts, all while trying to ignore the inevitable **** from Terry Richardsonthat says “Hey Buddy, my jackdar is going crazy! You baiting? Can I come over and take some pics?” No, Justin Theroux is Stealing Jennifer Aniston’s creams and serums to use on his face. Jenny Aniston, who is currently cashing checks from Aveeno, gave a live-action Aveeno advertisement interview to E! News where she outed Justin as a skincare-stealing THIEF:
“It’s hysterical. What product doesn’t he try to hijack? He’s good to his skin, that’s for sure. It’s always, ‘what are you using, what is that?’ It’s cute. He’s got gorgeous skin. Perfect skin.”

Uh huh. Let me guess: he just can’t get enough Aveeno® Ultra Calming® cleanser, Aveeno® Fresh Essentials® Daily Exfoliator, and Aveeno® Positively Ageless® Night Cream. Sike! You think Aniston actually uses shit from the drugstore? Rich bitch is rich; the only thing she uses Aveeno for is to tip housekeeping when she goes on vacation. “Thanks for picking up all my empty bottles of Smartwater®. Here, take some moisturizer. I’m told it’s good for moisture or something.”

Regardless of whether it’s Aveeno or not (it’s not) I don’t doubt Justin is Stealing her face stuff. Before Jenny, Justin had probably been to Mexico a handful of times. But a relationship with Jennifer Aniston means you’re on vacation 42 weeks out of the year, and all that Mexico has probably dried out his skin like a beaded lizard’s sunbaked nut sack. He’s not trying to be cute, Aniston, he’s trying to stay alive. If he doesn’t use every last drop of her Moisturizer and age-reversal cream and extra-strength skin hydrator, he’s going to start looking like the Brooklyn biker version of Tan Mom.


Dlisted | Justin Theroux Keeps Stealing Jennifer Aniston’s Moisturizer