Nothing brings me more joy than hearing a tiny human talk about Elmo using the kind of ******** that would make your raunchiest trailer park aunt blush. It’s an enjoyable kind of trashy, like referring to toilet paper as “ass rag” or deep-fried Mountain Dew sandwiches. And it sounds like Jason Bateman agrees, because in a recent GQ+A interview about his new film Bad Words, Jason talked about how familiar his Daughter Maple Bateman is with Class-4 expletives:
GQ: Do you actually Swear anywhere near as often as your character?
Jason Bateman: I tend to use as many as I can think of. I don’t do it Around my 7-year-old, but I do Around my 2-year-old, because she doesn’t know what the hell I’m saying yet.
GQ: What’s your go-to Swear word?
Jason Bateman: Motherfucker is pretty good.
Motherfucker is pretty good, especially when the situation calls for it, but sadly it’s one of those words that will get you a non-verbal side-eye beat down from strangers if you say it in public. It’s the catchiest of 22′s: you accidentally sit down in a urine-soaked bus seat, or some clueless trick runs over your foot with a shopping cart, and you’re not able to let out a good motherfucker because out of the corner of your eye you spot the little ears of an innocent chirrun, so instead you have to use some made-up shit like muffin puffer or mother father chinese dentist. I know; these are the real tragedies.
But more importantly than his gloriously casual use of the word motherfucker…Jason Bateman ****d his Daughter MAPLE BATEMAN?? Bless him and his wife for gifting her with such a delicious sounding ****. Maple Bateman? More like Maple Bacon. I need to stop thinking about Maple Bateman’s ****; I just imagined a maple bacon pancake stick swaddled in a baby blanket, and that’s all kinds of wrong.
Dlisted | Jason Bateman’s 2-Year-Old Daughter Probably Knows More Swears Than Us